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Joke
Old 14-05-2014   #1
Heavenly2
2nd Place Miss Twilight 2010

 
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InGame Character:
Heavenly2 is offline
Points: 23,668, Level: 67
Points: 23,668, Level: 67 Points: 23,668, Level: 67 Points: 23,668, Level: 67
Level up: 24%, 532 Points needed
Level up: 24% Level up: 24% Level up: 24%
Activity: 0%
Activity: 0% Activity: 0% Activity: 0%
Join Date: Feb 2007
Age: 43
Rep: Heavenly2 has a reputation beyond reputeHeavenly2 has a reputation beyond reputeHeavenly2 has a reputation beyond reputeHeavenly2 has a reputation beyond reputeHeavenly2 has a reputation beyond reputeHeavenly2 has a reputation beyond reputeHeavenly2 has a reputation beyond reputeHeavenly2 has a reputation beyond reputeHeavenly2 has a reputation beyond reputeHeavenly2 has a reputation beyond reputeHeavenly2 has a reputation beyond repute
Rep Power: 277
Casino Cash: 7487
Default Joke

Woman walks into a bar , sees a man smiling ear to ear...

Woman : why are you so happy
Man : well I have my special flying drink
Woman: flying drink?
Man: yea, watch


.. Man downs his drink , jumps out window flies around building, comes back in

.. woman jaw drops , cannot believe what she just seen..

Woman: Hey bartender can i get one of those

.. bartender gives lady same drink man has

.. woman sips drink..

Woman : well I don't feel any different , you sure I can fly
Man: well I didn't sip it, i downed it quick and u seen what I did
Woman: okay lets try it

.. woman downs drink, jumps out window SPLAT on to the ground below..

Bartender : You know SuperMan your a real Jerk when you been Drinking.
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Old 15-05-2014   #2
ALLeXyS
The Fallen Wizard

 
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InGame Character:
My Mood:
ALLeXyS is offline
Points: 13,533, Level: 50
Points: 13,533, Level: 50 Points: 13,533, Level: 50 Points: 13,533, Level: 50
Level up: 47%, 267 Points needed
Level up: 47% Level up: 47% Level up: 47%
Activity: 0%
Activity: 0% Activity: 0% Activity: 0%
Rank: Platinum MemberV.I.P. User
Join Date: Feb 2007
Rep: ALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond repute
Rep Power: 245
Casino Cash: 7093
Default

The Boss

One day a man goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The assistant takes the man to the parrot section and asks the man to choose one. The man asks, ''How much is the yellow one?''

The assistant says, ''$2000.'' The man is shocked and asks the assistant why it's so expensive. The assistant explains, ''This parrot is a very special one. He knows typewriting and can type really fast.''

''What about the green one?'' the man asks.

The assistant says, ''He costs $5000 because he knows typewriting and can answer incoming telephone calls and takes notes.''

''What about the red one?'' the man asks.

The assistant says, ''That one's $10,000.''

The man says, ''What does HE do?''

The assistant says, ''I don't know, but the other two call him boss.''
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Old 16-05-2014   #3
ALLeXyS
The Fallen Wizard

 
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InGame Character:
My Mood:
ALLeXyS is offline
Points: 13,533, Level: 50
Points: 13,533, Level: 50 Points: 13,533, Level: 50 Points: 13,533, Level: 50
Level up: 47%, 267 Points needed
Level up: 47% Level up: 47% Level up: 47%
Activity: 0%
Activity: 0% Activity: 0% Activity: 0%
Rank: Platinum MemberV.I.P. User
Join Date: Feb 2007
Rep: ALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond repute
Rep Power: 245
Casino Cash: 7093
Default

Cab Driver Goes to Heaven

A cab driver reaches the pearly gates. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book and tells him to pick up a gold staff and a silk robe and proceed into Heaven.

Next in line is a preacher. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book, furrows his brow and says, "OK, we'll let you in, but take that cloth robe and wooden staff."

The preacher is shocked and replies, "But I am a man of the cloth. You gave that cab driver a gold staff and a silk robe. Surely I rate higher than a cabbie!"

St. Peter responds matter-of-factly, "This is Heaven and up here, we are interested in results. When you preached, people slept. When the cabbie drove his taxi, people prayed."
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Old 17-05-2014   #4
ALLeXyS
The Fallen Wizard

 
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InGame Character:
My Mood:
ALLeXyS is offline
Points: 13,533, Level: 50
Points: 13,533, Level: 50 Points: 13,533, Level: 50 Points: 13,533, Level: 50
Level up: 47%, 267 Points needed
Level up: 47% Level up: 47% Level up: 47%
Activity: 0%
Activity: 0% Activity: 0% Activity: 0%
Rank: Platinum MemberV.I.P. User
Join Date: Feb 2007
Rep: ALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond reputeALLeXyS has a reputation beyond repute
Rep Power: 245
Casino Cash: 7093
Default

Accidental Bonding

A woman and man get into a car accident. Both of their cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither one of them is hurt.

After they crawl out of the wreckage, the woman says, "Wow, look at our cars -- there's nothing left! This must be a sign from Him that we should be friends and not try to pin the blame on each other."

The man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely."

The woman points to a bottle on the ground and says, "Somehow this bottle of Scotch from my back seat didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this Scotch and celebrate our good fortune."

She hands the bottle to the man. The man nods his head in agreement, opens it, and chugs about a third of the bottle to calm his nerves. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"

The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police."
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